Light Up Your Business
Welcome to the Light Up Your Business podcast, where we dive deep into the strategies, stories, and insights that drive growth, change, success and innovation for small business owners.
Each episode dives into the struggles behind the scenes—from burnout and financial pressure to self-doubt and juggling personal life. Whether you’re just starting out or scaling up, this podcast offers candid conversations, practical advice, and encouragement to help you stay grounded, find balance, and keep going. Because building a business shouldn’t mean losing yourself in the process.
Light Up Your Business
Breaking Free from Self-Sabotage with Albert Bramante
What if every "no" you've received in business wasn't actually rejection, but simply a message that your services aren't needed today? This perspective-shifting concept is just one of many game-changing insights shared by Dr. Albert Bramante in our latest conversation.
Albert brings his unique background as a PhD psychologist, certified hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner, and successful business owner to tackle the universal challenge of self-sabotage. Whether you're an established entrepreneur or just starting your business journey, you'll recognize the patterns he describes—the moments when we become our own worst enemies through fear, perfectionism, and self-doubt.
The conversation takes a deep dive into practical mindset shifts that can transform your business approach. Albert explains how our brains often disguise fear as logical thinking, creating convincing excuses that keep us playing small. He shares powerful language hacks like adding "yet" to statements about what you haven't accomplished, and replacing "I have to" with "I get to" when approaching tasks. These simple shifts fundamentally change how we approach challenges and opportunities.
Perhaps most valuable is the discussion around delegation and control. Many entrepreneurs become the bottleneck in their own businesses because they believe no one can do things as well as they can. Albert provides practical strategies for letting go, trusting others, and focusing on high-level growth rather than getting caught in day-to-day operations. As he explains, "Most of the time, the bottleneck isn't other factors—it's you."
Ready to break free from self-sabotaging patterns and take your business to new heights? Listen now and discover how psychological awareness could be your most powerful business tool. After this episode, you'll never look at rejection, delegation, or even your daily to-do list the same way again.
ALL ABOUT DR. ALBERT
Dr. Albert Bramante holds a distinguished Ph.D. in Psychology and is a certified hypnotherapist and NLP Practitioner. With a deep-rooted passion for understanding the intricacies of the human mind, Dr. Bramante has dedicated his career to exploring and mastering various therapeutic techniques. His extensive training with renowned hypnosis instructors has further solidified his expertise in the field.
In addition to his credentials in psychology and hypnotherapy, Dr. Bramante is currently authoring a book that promises to amalgamate his professional insights with personal experiences. Having overcome numerous challenges in his life, he believes in the transformative power of resilience and perseverance, themes he often touches upon in his writings and sessions.
Beyond the realm of psychology, Dr. Bramante has made significant strides in the entertainment industry as a talent agent based in New York City. His commitment to nurturing and promoting talent has led him to work with a diverse range of actors and professionals, fostering relationships built on trust and mutual respect.
A fervent advocate for self-development and spirituality, Dr. Bramante integrates these principles into his practice, offering a holistic approach to well-being. His dedication to personal growth is evident not only in his professional endeavors but also in his continuous pursuit of knowledge and self-awareness.
Say goodbye to overwhelm and self-doubt, and hello to confidence and success. Join the Faith Filled Coaching family today and step into the abundant future you've always envisioned.
Visit FaithFilledCoach.com to schedule your free 30-minute consultation. Let's make your business dreams a reality, together.
Welcome to the Light Up your Business podcast, the show where we dive deep into the world of small businesses. I'm your host, tammy Hershberger, and each episode will bring you inspiring stories, expert insights and practical tips to help your small business thrive. Whether you're an entrepreneur just starting out or a seasoned business owner, this podcast is your go-to source for success in the small business world. Let's get started to source for success in the small business world. Let's get started. Hi everyone, I want to welcome you back to another episode of Light Up your Business podcast. Today I have a special guest. His name is Albert Bramante and he has a PhD in psychology. He's a certified hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner. He integrates clinical and applied psychological techniques in his work. He's got over 20 years of experience in coaching, teaching and talent representation, operating as a licensed and franchised talent agent since 2003. He's the CEO and founder of Vermontay Artists. He's also the author of Rise Above the Script, confronting Self-Doubt and Mastering Self-Sabotage for Performing Artists. And so how are you today, albert? We welcome you to the podcast.
Albert Bramante:First of all, thank you, Kandi, for having me. I'm doing great. It's amazing. Yeah, I'm super excited to have you here.
Tammy Hershberger:We're going to dig into self-sabotage today, and so I kind of is there anything else you want to add? Before I just kind of jump into the questions?
Albert Bramante:No, ready to go whenever you're ready.
Albert Bramante:Okay, so for anyone who doesn't know you yet, can you give us a quick snapshot of kind of who you are and what you do besides what I just read? Sure, my name is Albert Bermondi. I also have worked in coaching. I wrote a book last year called Rise Above the Strip Perfuring Self-Doubt and Mastering Self-Sabotage for a Performing Artist, and so it's just something that I'm really passionate about and that's kind of where I became more of an expert in is performance mindset coaching, so helping individuals overcome self-doubt and, again, mastering self-sabotage.
Tammy Hershberger:Which is interesting. How many of us do that? I would say we probably all do it, don't you agree?
Albert Bramante:100%, 100%. And you know I even call myself that. I've done it several times myself. You know that I think it's important just to kind of know that.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, and to recognize it. So, basically, because you've worn many hats you've been a teacher, a talent rep, a coach, an author, a podcast guest how did your journey begin and what led you to this unique work that you do today?
Albert Bramante:I well again, I started just pretty much being always into reading, into knowledge, so I was considered a bookworm in college as well, even as a child growing up. The books were like my sanctuary. So I think that's what kind of solidified my love for learning, my love for getting knowledge. And then I just became interested in the mind and the brain, and so that really is what stuck with me for all this time is knowing what we pick and how black. That's something I'm very passionate about, and that was like my first foray into psych out. Studying psychology was, you know, just for my love of science, my love of the brain nervous system and all of that yeah, and so what would you say is a defining moment that really shaped you know how you show up today.
Albert Bramante:Well, the defining moment was, you know, just having the idea that I can overcome a lot. You know, whether it's when I received my PhD, walking across that stage was a major achievement, as well as starting and launching a business, you know, and being somewhat, you know, successful in that, that, what I say, would be the major factor.
Tammy Hershberger:And I have to ask you really fast I don't have this in my questions, but starting a business, what made you do that? I mean, psychology is one whole beast of its own, but then you ended up starting a business. What made you do that? It sure is.
Albert Bramante:Well, I in college, in high school and college, I was very much interested in acting. I wouldn't consider myself interested in professional acting, but I was very much into being around actors and working with actors. I took some classes in college. I was involved in some extracurricular activities which are like around theater and acting, and so I wanted to kind of pursue that interest a bit and so I love being around actors and that was one thing. I really just creative people in general, whether it's actors, artists, those are what really I feel so connected with.
Tammy Hershberger:So that explains why you have the Bramante Artists. Is that the business that you started originally?
Albert Bramante:Yes.
Tammy Hershberger:Yes, absolutely.
Albert Bramante:That was like. Well, initially that was the Bramante Artists is my latest company, Because what happened was that my first company was called Emerging Talent and I had that from 2004 to 2020. And then, during the pandemic, I had partnered up with another agent and started another entity called Bonafide and Emerging Artists, which I co-branded for three years. And then what happened after that is, I kind of went back on my own and that's when I was like I'm gonna rebrand and call it Vermontay Artist, you know, using like my namesake.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, do you want a quick? I want you to do a little shout out for your business really fast, so can you tell people that are listening that maybe need that service what it is and exactly what you offer people.
Albert Bramante:Sure well, one thing that I will offer you know well, the Vermontae Artist is mainly for actors and anybody who's pursuing acting professionally, so it's a talent agency. So we basically essentially serve as an employment agent for actors. What that entails is we find opportunities, work opportunities. Now, what I also do on the coaching side of things is I work with helping people overcome their limitations, their self-imposed limitations. So a lot of times what I find is people get in their own way, as I mentioned earlier about the self-sabotage. So helping people deal with issues that come up, with self-doubt, imposter syndrome and anything else that may come up Fear of success, blocks, any other type of subconscious blocks that can sometimes come up.
Tammy Hershberger:And what do you see as the most common type of self-sabotage that you see with entrepreneurs and business owners?
Albert Bramante:not, maybe not putting yourself forward, not, uh, you know being the best you can be.
Tammy Hershberger:So, yeah, that's what I would kind of see I can definitely connect to that because I'm a business owner. Obviously I have podcasts, I coach all that. But it is interesting how much we don't believe in ourselves and then we limit ourselves because we're like, well, we can't do that, we don't have enough education. I don't have that experience.
Albert Bramante:Right, and you start listening to that in a sense, where it's like I don't believe I can do this or I don't believe I'm that successful in that, and so you start listening to that voice in your head and then you start like playing small, yeah, which can happen. There's a lot of times some people just play small.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, Can you give us a little more information for someone who's like this is new to them? What does play small mean?
Albert Bramante:Not taking advantage of the full, your fullest potential, maybe acting out of fear, so maybe you don't take that leap that you need to start that business. Or, to you know, go to do, do the steps that's really needed to fully thrive. It's like playing, playing in sync.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, that's a good way to explain it. And how do you help people recognize when doubt is disguising itself as logic, or perfectionism, or procrastination?
Albert Bramante:Well, it's pointing it out because a lot of times fear, our brain is designed to defend us from fear and defend us from danger. That's what it's designed to do, and so very often, what we want is to kind of start retraining that brain to say, look, I'm not in danger anymore, and what might appear as logic would be okay. You protect the brain to protect you, and so what might come up with as a logical step would be okay. I'm not going to do this. I'm not going to go to this, this networking event, I'm not going to do this presentation Because I don't want to be found out. I don't want you know, I don't want to be found out. I don't want people to find out that I'm a fraud. And so, once it happens, maybe you'll stay home, maybe you won't go to that networking event. You'll find an excuse I'm too busy, there's a lot of traffic, I don't feel well and therefore you just keep being stuck in a state of non-productive or even victim mode, which is, I can't do anything right.
Tammy Hershberger:And it becomes a negative feedback loop. No, I'm sorry. Continue A negative feedback loop. I like that. So then you're just constantly telling yourself all of these excuses really is what is holding you back? Because it's fear absolutely a fear is a major thing that will hold you back and so if you're stuck in that and if you're listening listening now and you're like, okay, I've done that, I'm currently doing that, what is like the shift? Or how do you because you said, retrain the brain, what does that look like?
Albert Bramante:well, that looks like like taking action, doing things that are differently, like stepping outside your comfort zone, um, and doing small actions. So what I would say? Definitely take action, so, and that that could look differently from everybody because it depends upon what your goals are, but I would start taking small, consistent steps. So, whether it's looking for collaborators, putting yourself out there If you're a speaker, getting involved in even small stages, go to a local Toastmasters or go someplace where you can practice giving a presentation, even going live on social media for two minutes or even five minutes a day, and just really putting yourself out. There is the key.
Tammy Hershberger:And I would imagine I mean in my own experience it kind of starts to build your confidence Like, okay, I did it, I didn't freak out, it didn't get terrible reviews or whatever. And then it just kind of that confidence helps you do the next one right, just kind of baby, to build your confidence like, okay, I did it, I didn't freak out, it didn't get terrible reviews or whatever. And then it just kind of that confidence helps you do the next one right, just kind of baby step it yes, absolutely, just it's taking one little thing at a time and what is it in our brain that makes that feel like is there a term for it?
Tammy Hershberger:or because I always think like, why do I build even myself? I build stuff up so big. And then I get to that moment and I push myself through it and I'm like that was not as bad as I thought it was going to be well, we, we generalize and we distort.
Albert Bramante:so it's like we distort things, we generalize and we maybe magnify things more than what they really are. Maybe magnify things more than what they really are, and fear will do that Because, really, if you think about this, fear is really. It's all about false evidence appearing real, and that's what really fear stands for. If you think about it is false evidence appearing real. So we tend to blow things up out of proportion, because even if you take the worst case scenario of a lot of things, the way we put it in our mind compared to reality is going to be much different.
Tammy Hershberger:I have never heard, I don't know. I guess I never knew fear was false. Can you tell me that one more time? I want to write that down False evidence, right?
Albert Bramante:Appearing real, appearing real.
Tammy Hershberger:How good is that? I mean like, if you think about that, we are. You're letting your mind make things appear real, real that are not real, and so I want to ask this do you have any good stories or testimony or anything you can share of someone that you've worked with that was like really struggling with this and you helped them to break through that?
Albert Bramante:because that's inspiring for other people who are struggling with this yeah, absolutely going back to you with the acting example, I met this, this uh person who was studying, you know, to be an actor. She was in classes for like 10 years but could never book work. Now, outside of acting, she was a vice in the corporate world. She was a vice president of of her division in a major department store. So she had a lot of successful experience and she had a gravitas about her that really people looked up to. However, when it came to she just couldn't deliver. That same.
Albert Bramante:She became very it was very mousy and very submissive. So it was kind of like just coaching her to like, okay, use that gravitas that you have naturally and put it to the roles that you can play. And it was a lot about building her confidence because part of it she just started to really feel like maybe acting isn't for me, maybe I'm just not a good actor and or a good actress, and so it's after time, by just getting her to have that confidence and to apply what she already knew. She already knew how to how to communicate because she already knew. She already knew how to communicate because she was vice president of a company, a division of a company, and she was doing very well corporately and she was also involved in different civic organizations, so she had very good communication skills. But the confidence about acting wasn't there. So it was kind of like, okay, let's transform and apply that persona or that ability that you have and apply it to acting, and when she was able to do that, she started booking work.
Albert Bramante:So is it really like a mind?
Tammy Hershberger:shift is what you're saying. It's more of a mind shift she had to make.
Albert Bramante:In that case, yes, now, because she already had the training. She was already involved in nine or ten years in active training, so she already had the training. It wasn't that Now you still need training, of course, or any skill that you're going to do, but with mindset it's like you get out of your brain, you get out of your head and you don't second guess yourself and you'd be surprised about how, how effective people can be when they get out of their head in a sense yeah, that's huge.
Tammy Hershberger:So you're saying so. When you because you're dealing with different clients, but mostly actors it sounds like um, so you're really in the conversation, because there's people out there who don't even know what coaching is. They're like I've never heard of it. You know, the ones I talk to sometimes are like I know what a baseball coach is, is it like that? But so you're saying it's similar. You're trying to find their natural talent, what they're naturally good at, and then you just got to get their brain to stop telling them they're no good exactly it's like.
Albert Bramante:really, what a coach does is bring out your natural abilities, whether that's the athletic coach, baseball coach helps you become a better baseball player, or better football coach helps you become a better football player, but we've helped you become whether it's a mindset coach, a performance coach is become the best version of yourself.
Tammy Hershberger:And can you can you kind of tell people what that looks like? If there's someone that's thinking about doing something like that and they're like I just am scared of what that looks like, because for me it's just conversations and trying to get them to see it, but is that kind of similar to how you do it? Or?
Albert Bramante:yeah, yeah, I mean it's. It's. A good coach may not precisely, um, tell you exactly what you need to do. It'll help. What a good coach can do is help you find the answer to yourself. So it's like finding the answers within that, because we all have it. If we really truly listen to yourself and get out of that, you know, a superficial fear and chatter, we can really, you know, we have really potential for greatness yeah, absolutely but we just need to listen to that more and so how do you, when you're working with someone and you've kind of started to identify, you know, these self-limiting beliefs?
Tammy Hershberger:what does it look like that? What do you do? How do you reframe that so they can then take that and operate from strength versus self-doubt?
Albert Bramante:well, it just remind. I think it just reminds people that they have all the answers they need.
Albert Bramante:You know they everything that they really need. It's just okay, we need to help you, um, peel that layer. So it's sort of like even just asking some questions. This is a question like what do you really want? If you could have anything in the world, what would that look like? If, uh, something, if you could wait to match up on, what would your perfect day look like, what would your perfect thing look like? And then, okay, what do you need to get there? And so a lot of times, a good coach asks questions rather than being more thorough, care and a prescriptive nature.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, and in those questions it's kind of fun. I'm sure you've had this so many times. But when you're talking to someone and you're asking those questions, you're digging in right, making them think and kind of process, and they kind of have that light bulb moment. But they're like I see something different. I get what you're saying. It's registering different.
Albert Bramante:I mean, for me that's so much, it's so rewarding when I see those moments where they're like okay, I see now where I'm missing it yeah, absolutely it's, and that's what really, again, a good coach will help you do is to really understand what, what answers you have and what and what knowledge you have, and tap into that state rather than again directly giving you the answer. It's like, again, when you're helping a parent, helping a child with their homework you don't do the homework for them, but you help them find the answers that they need on their own.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, and I think, um, let me think about that for a sec, cause I talked to someone recently. We're like, okay, I, I wasn't, they didn't know what coaching was, and they were like I thought maybe you were just going to tell me what to do. And I was like, no, that's not, it's not my job, I don't know your path, I don't know Like we have to dig into that and so it's kind of fun. Just, I mean, I've had my own experience with that. We're like, as soon as I start to notice, okay, that's self-sabotage. And then later I do something and I, you catch it. I mean that would be part of your training, right, you make them so they start catching it faster. When I'm like, oh, that's, that's self-sabotage or that's demeaning myself or that's I just, you know, self-sabotage because I thought in that moment I can't apply for that because I'm not good enough, I don't have the experience yeah, and, and sometimes when people say that you can generally say that well, well, who said you don't have the experience?
Tammy Hershberger:that's so good. Yes, who told you?
Albert Bramante:and it's like who told you that exactly and most of them they can't answer that because nobody did, it's their own brain down on that. So I I think that's by asking the right question well, you can't, you know? Or sometimes even just questioning like I can't do anything right, nothing. You, you got up today, you went to work, you got a job, you know, you did something right can I ask you?
Tammy Hershberger:a question based in psychology here. Do you think a lot of this self-sabotage comes from, like past or parents or things we were told, or is it more? Does this stuff tend to come more as we get older, or is there no good answer for that?
Albert Bramante:I I kind of don't think there's a one, one perfect answer for that. I think that it's a combination though one perfect answer for that.
Albert Bramante:I think that it's a combination, though. It's a combination of our own experience, their teachers that we've had the negative things we were told by, whether our parents or family. Sometimes these people can be well-meaning, but they don't. You know, what came out was in kind of like a negative way in a sense, or what came out it came out in a poor way so, but it's really. It does start with what we were told. You know the message that we received as a child growing up, because as children, we're kind of like taught that you know our parents and our teachers know best and they're the experts. So listen to your parents, listen to your teachers.
Tammy Hershberger:And then you kind of let that ingrain in your heart. Is what you're saying? Like you've now taken that and kind of taken that as fact, right?
Albert Bramante:yeah, because we're told to believe that.
Tammy Hershberger:That's fact yeah, in a sense so if someone's listening right now and they're saying, okay, I hear what you're saying, and I'm starting to see like, yeah, I'm kind of stuck, you know, I'm stuck between what I'm good at and what I actually have potential for, what would you tell them? How could they start aligning that talent with their purpose-driven work?
Albert Bramante:Well, I would just say, as you're aligning your talent, is to just be open to it and really just give it a shot, because one one of the things this is why I often recommend people just to take action because once you do something, you become comfortable with it and you'll more easily do more of it. So I would say the biggest thing would just to start taking action and not idea. So a lot of a big factor that a lot of people, I think, run into when it comes to doing stuff and taking action is they come up with the word someday, which is not true. There's no such word as someday. Someday doesn't exist because it's conjecture.
Albert Bramante:So if you say, well, someday I'm going to do this, or someday I'm going to create this, or someday I'm going to create this, or someday I'm going to start a business, that'll never happen Because someday again it's not on the calendar. So the main thing is it's not taking action, and this is where a good coach can help you be accountable. Okay, you're saying when you know, give me a date that you'll at least have whatever it is set out, and you start with bite-sized chunks, because a lot of time, when people set goals, they set goals that are too too big, too fast, and so that can often again create that self-doubt when you don't reach that goal. And it's not that that goal was unreasonable, but the steps could have been broken down a bit more.
Tammy Hershberger:So one of the things you know to start goal, you know setting goals that are reasonable, small and measurable yeah I like that um, when you say, and measurable just means that you need to be able to track when I hit it or when I accomplished it right, so that way you can yes okay, I like that.
Tammy Hershberger:Um, tell me about this. So, in what is the mindset so like if? Because I just kind of like pick myself back up again. But if I set a goal and I missed it, I see sometimes people beat themselves up so much over that that they almost can't start again, because now they're in such self-defeat. Do you have any advice for that?
Albert Bramante:well, I think the first thing is to accomplish that, to really celebrate the fact that, look, you did. You already set yourself up and that's automatically a great thing. You set yourself up for things, you already did that and you should already be celebrating yourself for that. So that should be really. The first step is to really just celebrate the fact that you had that success. You already made an effort to that, because a lot of times, people just, you know, don't even start. The fact that you started is an amazing thing and should be celebrated and accomplished, because a lot of people don't even get to that point yet where they don't even start, and so one thing I often say is there's no such thing as failure, only feedback. So even if it doesn't work out what you set out to do initially, in the beginning, it's still a learning curve. There's so much more information you can learn from that and adopt from that, and then, therefore, that can help you the next time that you set to do something.
Tammy Hershberger:I really, really like that. You said no such thing as failure-only feedback. If you think about the pressure that takes off of you, because I've had losses, I've had businesses that didn't work out or whatever, and there was moments where, like I almost thought I'm such a failure, it didn't work or the partnership didn't work or whatever. But then that's been a mind shift.
Tammy Hershberger:I've had to learn and I think a lot of people do because for me me I've learned that it's not a you know, it's not a failure it's a lesson, it's feedback, it's things that I can take and improve and do different next time and if people could get that concept, it would change their life absolutely.
Albert Bramante:It will really change their life if you really learn that and just adopt it.
Tammy Hershberger:So so in that, then I want to wrap gratitude into this, because I know for you and for myself, it plays a huge role in our work. Um, how do you feel that? Having gratitude, being thankful, um, how does that look like? How do you get that into your practice every day and how do you get that to use? Let me rephrase that how do you use gratitude to get you from fear and out of self-criticism? Like what is that? How do you package that to people? You from fear and out of self-criticism? Like what is that? How do you package that to people?
Albert Bramante:Well, so gratitude is just really being thankful and appreciative for what you have, and that is so important to just be thankful for, again, what you have and to be appreciative of what you have. So be appreciative of what you have, and it could be something very tiny thing to be thankful, so a good way to get gravity would be okay each day. What are three things that you can be grateful for, and whether it's okay, I have a great family. I have pets that I love, that love me, you know, even the fact that I'm taking action and doing something and not letting fear dictate me or dictate my actions. That can be something to be thankful for too. To be thankful for too. So I would say, definitely say, you know, start small and be grateful for little things in life, because that's what really, what true happiness is all about is having gratitude.
Tammy Hershberger:And it kind of gets you focused off what you don't have. I mean, my own experience with that was, I mean, I was always thankful, but in my businesses that, as they were doubling and growing, I was always thankful, but in my businesses that, whereas they were doubling and growing, I can never even just sit in the moment of like how amazing this is, that we did this. Right, we doubled, we tripled, whatever. I would always have to think long term, and that to me is so. It wore me out, because one I'm not enjoying the moment of like, wow, we actually just did something huge. So how can you talk to people about that a little bit more?
Albert Bramante:Well, I think a lot of times we don't appreciate we have to lose, you know, we think that, you know, we start to like look at, the grass is green. On the other side other people have said I don't have and therefore that can again limit, limit us. So I would say just definitely, you know, take a moment of what you have, take stock of what you have and just be appreciative of that you know, because, again, there's so much you already have that you don't even know that you have. There's so many things you don't know that you really don't have to think you. There's so many things you don't know that you, you know, really don't have to think about it.
Albert Bramante:So what I would say is definitely take appreciation of what you have and go with that.
Tammy Hershberger:And then that will, I think, help propel you, because you're not in this constant search of more. So you're kind of content with this expectation of like okay, I did this, I have this, and why couldn't I do the next step right? And I think mentally it's just such a I don't know what the word is but it's such a better projection for where you're going, because you're not just constantly, because I feel like when you're and I don't know psychologically what the answer is for that but when you're always searching for something, I feel like there's a hole somewhere that you're trying to fill.
Albert Bramante:Yes, and that's a lot of times. We focus so much on what we don't have, or what we think we don't have, rather than focusing on what we do have and there's nothing more. We're striving to do better, but a lot of times we don't take time to even celebrate what we have already, and so we're just focusing again and what we don't have and that kind of becomes a search for more or different right is what I'm hearing you say right yeah more different.
Albert Bramante:And then you start, you and your life is like well, what's what's wrong with me that I don't?
Tammy Hershberger:have this. That's a good point.
Albert Bramante:And so now again we go back into the victim mode of I don't have this, I can't. You know, I was never blessed with that, I don't have this talent. And and then we just don't apply ourselves.
Tammy Hershberger:And that's kind of when the self-sabotage monster comes right, Because he's like okay, now I've gotten myself, like you said, I don't have this, I don't have enough, I wasn't born with it, and then we just manipulate ourselves into thinking we're not enough, and then that whole monster starts right.
Albert Bramante:Yeah, the not enough thing. Yeah, absolutely, it's a big one. Yeah, you know that big mountain in the cloud, that elephant in the room that we don't feel like we have anything or we don't have, we don't feel we have enough, and that can definitely start to just lead us down a path of you know where that self-doubt comes in.
Tammy Hershberger:Now I am curious because you have NLP and hypnotherapyotherapy is there can you tell me um, or share with me a powerful internal shift or technique, using that, of how we could get people to stop self-limiting themselves, rewire their brain or whatever it takes to do that?
Albert Bramante:yeah, well, I would say the first thing is again again, looking at failure as feedback only. And another shift, especially for actors, that I found is reframing the idea of rejection. So a lot of, because I'll hear a lot of people say I wish I could be an actor, but I'm afraid of all the rejection. So the one thing I would say is what if we looked at it like there's no such thing as rejection, only a reminder that our services are not needed today, and if we take that? Because when we do that, what happens is we don't take it personally anymore, so it's no longer personal, that rejection is no longer personal, because a lot of times people take the no's as personal.
Albert Bramante:They take it personal I didn't get the job, I didn't get that and a lot of times it's not personal. There's only one person that can get the job. Personal, there's only one person that can get a job. So I think if we look at things from that perspective of saying, okay, it's not personal, it's just we're not needed today. Today, that doesn't mean tomorrow, that doesn't mean, you know, in the near future, next week, it just means today, because a lot of times when we get told that no, whether it's getting a job or the near future, next week, it just means today. Because a lot of times when we get told that no, whether it's getting a job or the acting role, we start to internalize and start to beat ourselves up and say, see, I know that means I'm not talented, but it's just not today, it just was not this particular opportunity.
Tammy Hershberger:I think that is so amazing. What you just said Reframe the idea of rejection. Our services are not needed today Because, as an entrepreneur, I have salespeople, I have to do sales, sometimes coaching. Whatever you're selling, whatever you're doing, that rejection comes and that is why a lot of salesmen struggle because they hear so much rejection. But I love that our services are not needed today. Today, it doesn't mean that you're a terrible salesman, it doesn't mean you're overpriced. It just means that today, in this moment, your services are. I just love that. I'm going to use that in my sales training.
Albert Bramante:I think that's amazing and you know, because a lot of times that I would imagine this you know, with a lot of sales people, especially those that are really starting out, they're so determined I need to make that sale but they try too hard and therefore it will backfire on them because they're trying really too hard to get the customer to like them or the customer to buy the product. So it's kind of like having a confidence where, yes, you want to make the sale but at the end of the day, you know, even if you have that framework, I don't really need that sale at the moment Because you make it more about like my product is going to be helpful to you.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, and I've heard it, like every yes or, I'm sorry, every no gets you closer to a yes, but it's never come across like what you just said to me, because I watched. I think he was 20 years old. He came to sell window cleaning and he's like I can do it, I want to be a salesman. So we brought him in, gave him a shot and he struggled so much because of the nose and then he you know, he's not in a place at his age to do window cleaning, it's just not valuable to him. So he didn't see the value in the price. But and then after I think maybe a month, he came back and he was like I just can't sell, I can't do it, I'm not good at it. And it's all because he stopped believing in I mean, because he came in so positive, I can do it. And then, you know just the nose eventually turned to like I can't do it, I don't have it, I'm not good at that.
Tammy Hershberger:And so I think that's you're gonna set some people free with that today.
Albert Bramante:Well, that's the great thing, If I can help set one person free. We can help set one person free. That's amazing Because again, it's that we have the power, and a lot of times again, we're our own worst enemy.
Tammy Hershberger:You know, our brain is sometimes our own worst enemy. Yeah, I also kind of this kind of goes along with that. But, like, as entrepreneurs, we have this pressure, especially when you're smaller because you don't have huge sales teams and stuff. But you have to figure it all out. Right, I'm wearing a lot of hats, I got to figure it all out. What do you have that you could tell us to help us, like a technique or something to help reframe our mindset, where we're not always second guessing ourselves when we make a decision?
Albert Bramante:Well, I would say, you know, refer to your training. You already have a lot of training, you already have a lot of knowledge. So listen to yourself and you know, if you need you know, go network with other entrepreneurs, network with other business people, especially in your industry, even though that may be even even I'll go step further even people that can be, that may be your competitors. But if you can network with them, they can kind of tell you again what you know, what you're doing and what mistakes that you. You know, what they can help you like, set up a learning curve in a sense. So I would say, utilize the networks you have.
Tammy Hershberger:And then that builds community. So cause I would imagine I mean I kind of know for myself, but the more people I have around me that are doing similar things as far as you know, the business world or whatever, they understand some of the struggles. And then when I say like, because I, the business world can be very lonely if you don't have people around you that are other business owners, right, because employees they go home, they're done for the day. I have to constantly think about payroll and insurance and all these things and getting more customers and right, it cut that community right mentally, kind of there's got to be something psychologically knowing like I'm not in this alone.
Albert Bramante:Yeah, and that's why, like, masterminds are great, support networks are great, you know, business groups, you know, are an amazing tool that we should all be tapping into Because, again, they can really help us achieve a lot by again giving us that support. Also be like it's an alerting curve, like you know, because I'm not supposed to share it to them, what works for them, what didn't work for them, and maybe that can save somebody some time. So, and and again, you know, being an entrepreneur, and I could tell you, even being myself being an entrepreneur, it can be lonely, you know, because you know even if you have employees, they're not.
Albert Bramante:They don't share the same struggles you have. You know their. You know their job is just to. You know do their job in the home. You know running a business. Can you know one of the advantages I'm really glad to be an entrepreneur. You know it's great to be one, but there's also a lot of challenges that come with that.
Tammy Hershberger:I have to ask you this cause you're a psychologist. Um, when it comes to like for me, my spouse is very involved. We run the businesses together, but when and I've seen it in window cleaning industry, for sure. But there's a lot of spouses, you know they're, they're running the home and their family and the kids and they're not real involved in the business. What would you say for them that, like the spouse out there that's struggling, like I'm sick of this business, my husband pays all the attention to it, you know. And then the husbands, you know, like I can't share this with my wife because she's not going to, she's not going to understand, she has her own stuff. Do you have any advice for that, because I hear that a lot from people who are struggling like that.
Albert Bramante:Well, I would say, just be open. You know, talk to your spouse. They may not be on this hand, but they can certainly be there for you, be an emotional sounding board for you, and maybe the fact that even if they're not directly involved in the business may be helpful because they can give you a third-person perspective. And I think it's great the fact that you can work together, because then you share stuff. Not only do you share the business side of things, you can also share what each one is going through, so you can help the household duties and split that up. One is going through so you can help the household duties and split that up.
Albert Bramante:But I think the main thing is just be partners in a sense, because that's what you are, even as my couple. You're really partners. So you may not necessarily know the technical side of the business, but you can at least be offering support side of the business. But you can at least be offering support and that may just be, in any way possible, offering support to your partner or whatever they need, whether, again, whether it's just an event, whether it's just a distraction in a sense, because a lot of times you may not understand what our spouse is going through, and so that's why one thing is not to pressure them, because a lot of times I think the biggest thing that we hear that I hear a lot with spouses and business people oh, they're not around enough, you know they're too busy. They're not around enough, you know they're too busy, they're too married to their work.
Albert Bramante:Yes, and one thing that's really helpful for entrepreneurs, which is challenging, but we should have the ability to turn off a little bit from our business and de-stress, because a lot of times, what the biggest mistake a lot of business people do is they overwork themselves and then they wind up getting burnout and even some health challenges because they don't take care of themselves. They're too focused again on their work that they don't really focus on living. So the one thing I would say is like take some time off If you can't take a vacation, because if you work for a real company as an employee, you get vacation time and that's for a reason, and I think a lot of people don't don't really know how to sometimes disconnect, and that's really important is the ability to disconnect.
Tammy Hershberger:Do you think fear plays a role in that, that they're scared if they step back they're going to lose customers, they're not going to have sales, they can't trust people. Does any of that have to do with that?
Albert Bramante:Yeah, well, that's what lies in perfectionism. Because, then you start to think well, nobody can do the job like I can. And then you know a lot of times what entrepreneurs suffer with I think, or even deal with a lot, and that can again speak from experience is the lack of delegation, you know, not being able to delegate tasks or duties and things, and that feeling of I need to do everything myself and again that's not really helpful or healthy, or true.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah.
Albert Bramante:Is that?
Tammy Hershberger:like a form of self-sabotage. Basically, right.
Albert Bramante:Absolutely, because, first of all, we can only do so much until we're going to burn out and therefore you're not going to be productive at all.
Albert Bramante:So what you're trying to work hard to produce, it's actually now going to work hard against you, because you didn't listen to the signals in your body, you didn't be stressed.
Albert Bramante:Instead, you came with the mentality I need to do it all, you don't do anything, or you you know what's up, just failing because, again, we can only do so much. So I think the important thing is learning to outsource and learn to delegate, you know, and focusing on the more important things of running the business, because I looked even a lot like the work of like Tony Robbins, and the one thing that he often says which makes a lot of sense, is people are not business owners and they're business operators. They don't really know how to own a business. They know how to operate a business, because really owning a business if you think of a lot of the more successful businesses the owners are not really involved in the floor. I mean, they're more behind the scenes and they have other people running the show and that takes a lot of trust. That has to be developed too, to trust other people to help you run the business. So you know that goes back into the whole idea of micromanaging.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah.
Albert Bramante:Because the one thing human beings don't like to do is be micromanaging. Yeah, because the one thing human beings don't like to do is be micromanaged.
Tammy Hershberger:And micromanagement is fear right, Because you don't trust them.
Albert Bramante:Right and people pick that up, which is self-sabotage, because you're going to destroy your business by micromanaging everybody. And you're going to start a relationship you have with your employees and if they're going to become unhappy and of course if they're unhappy, that means you're going to see a lot of turnover rate and resignation happening- so tell me this really fast If someone's listening and they're getting it and they're like, okay, that's me and I've got to change this, I'm ready to take a change.
Tammy Hershberger:What do you say to them? How do we fix this problem?
Albert Bramante:So take a list of all your duties that you do every day, maybe log in for a week what you do, and then take a list and say can somebody else do this, can I outsource this? And most of the time the mundane administrative, automated stuff can be done by other people and that's when you start delegating that. So this way you can then focusing on the most important thing building the business and so you have somebody else handling that, the administrative and the routine stuff, and you're focusing on building and expanding the business. Like for me, I have you, you know, with Vermont Artists. I have an assistant who handles the administrative work and social media, because I don't have time to do that, but I know.
Albert Bramante:I want to have an active social media presence for Vermont Artists. So therefore I delegate and you know, and she's doing a much better job than I would have done, and I can admit that Because she loves social media. So I think giving people tasks that they you know, giving away your delegating path, is so important, but letting that control go, which can be challenging. But that's the important thing is really learning to give up that control.
Tammy Hershberger:And then what are you mentally telling yourself to stay out of the doubt of? Like, okay, I gave it, but I don't want to go back and get it, but I can't do that. Like what is? Do you have anything to say to that?
Albert Bramante:Well, I would say, just trust the process, let it go and then, even if you delegated the person's not performing well, well, work with that person, give them that coaching, give them that instruction, talk to them, be clear in your expectations of what you want.
Tammy Hershberger:So, having those open conversations, but it you know, at the end of the day, it's just about trusting yourself and then not letting that fear of like blowing it out of proportion, like okay, worst case, they mess it up and a post goes out wrong or post doesn't go or most things can be fixed, because I think we were like, oh, if they win that belief of no one else can do it as good as me, we blow it up into the thing of like it's gonna destroy my business and I'm like it's one thing, it's not gonna, you know, unless they burnt your building down, you're gonna be okay you're gonna be fine and okay.
Albert Bramante:So it's, it's one thing that was made a mistake. So then you have you talk to your person's doing your social media and say we cannot really repeat this. You could take it down and say, okay, the next time, this is what should be done differently. Give that feedback. And it's not the end of the world. And a lot of people, I think, when they make mistakes, it's like they blow it out of proportion again, like, oh, I failed. No, we're all going to make mistakes, every one of us. I can tell you I've made a lot of mistakes and I'm going to make mistakes in the future. So you know, and just trusting the process is really the key, you know, and just I think also learning to let go is really what's going to be the important thing. To be able to delegate is just learning to let go of that control. You know it's still your business, but you're just letting somebody else do the task. That can free up your schedule a bit.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, that's where the real growth is going to happen. When you stop, you work on top, you know high level stuff that, like you're, the people in different positions below you cannot do because you kind of become the bottleneck. If you can't let go of stuff, I mean it's just going to happen your business is going to stay a certain size because you can't grow yeah, and a lot of people what they don't really say I want to find bottleneck.
Albert Bramante:What's very often true is that there's a bottleneck. It's not other factors, it's you that's a bottleneck.
Tammy Hershberger:And that's driven by fear, which is self-sabotage, because you're doubting, you're not trusting. It's interesting how it all wraps back together. Yeah, and if you notice the thing that keeps?
Albert Bramante:coming up here is self-sabotage, because you don't, you're doubting, you're not trusting. It's interesting how it all wraps back together, yeah, and and if you notice, the thing that keeps coming up here is self-sabotage. So it's and the thing about what self-sabotage is very sneaky again, we don't realize we're doing. It becomes so sneaky that we don't even realize it's happening.
Tammy Hershberger:I have to ask you this because you're like me you're a bookworm. You like to read and learn. Is there anything recently that you've gotten some new revelation on that? You're like I've never in all my years caught that or anything you can share with us.
Albert Bramante:Well, I'm reading a book now called Smart Productivity it's actually called Feel Good Productivity by Ali Abdaal, and it's really about one of the things that makes sense. And you know, I can't really say it's a surprising revelation. But it makes sense and you know, I don't know, can't really say it's a surprising revelation, but it makes it this thing that there's a difference between being being busy and being productive, because we can be very, you know, people can be very busy, but that doesn't mean that they're going to be successful or productive. And also the book kind of talks about which makes so perfect sense is to have fun. You know, even when you're doing work, try to find some fun in it, because then it'll make it interesting, and that's a revelation too. Like this doesn't have to be tedious, we can learn to enjoy it too too well, I think that's part of the fun of people that are entrepreneurs.
Tammy Hershberger:Um, we like to do our own thing. We don't really like to it's not the right word to say be bossed around, but like we kind of want to blaze our own path, if you will. And that's what. For so long, I was in such a crazy situation with all these businesses and burnout and I just wasn't. I was so miserable, I wasn't enjoying. I mean, thankfully I didn't take it out on my people, but I took it out on myself and I was so miserable, I was not having any fun. And I've gotten that all fixed up and cleaned up and I'm working through it and I'm I'm loving life right. I love the podcast, I'm loving my businesses. I come in with a smile on my face and I think life's so short to be so serious. And so you know, in this tight box all the time, Absolutely.
Albert Bramante:That's the biggest thing too is just having fun while you're doing it, because, again, if you're not having fun it's not worth it. You know, it's not worth stressing out over it, because life is short.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah Well, we're close to the end here. I have a question Do you have, can you give one more? I mean, you've already gave us a ton here, but can you give us one more mindset shift today that we could use to overcome fear, self-doubt, and what would that be? What's your final takeaway for people listening?
Albert Bramante:So this is more of a language shift. So one thing you could say is, instead of saying you know what you haven't done, I would use the powerful three-letter word that I would use is yet. So when people say I haven't done this, you know it should be replaced you haven't done this yet, so you know, I haven't made sales, I haven't made sales, I haven't made sales yet. Or I haven't, you know, made six. I haven't made six three years yet.
Tammy Hershberger:Because when you say the word yet, it opens yourself up the possibility and it's not so final right is what you're saying, because like it's not, like it's in the past, it's done right there's, it's not like it's in the past.
Albert Bramante:It's done Right, it's not final. And then sometimes again it would be like well, if somebody says it's final, I would say and who said that? Who told you it's final? And again, most of the time they're not going to answer that Because that's a script they're running in their head.
Tammy Hershberger:You just set me free with that, because I have these things that I'm like this didn't work, that didn't work. It's not final, it's not done yet, or maybe something hasn't quite materialized the way I want it to, but it's not done yet. I love that yeah.
Albert Bramante:It's just yet, that doesn't mean yeah, it's just yet, that doesn't mean it's not gonna get, it's just not yet. So if we start reading that framework of yet and adding that at the end, yet and also one last thing I would say, another language hack that we can use is, instead of saying I have to do this, say I get to do this because a lot of people say, well, I have to go to work today. I get to do this Because a lot of people say, well, I have to go to work today. No, you get to go to work today. Or I have to run this for my business. No, you get to do this for your business. So that makes it more exciting when you say I get to do this Because again, it's all about your success in a sense, and again it's more empowering.
Albert Bramante:And you're bringing gratitude into it, correct? Yes, because you get to do it. It's so exciting. Look what you get to do. You get up. You get to run your business. You get up. You get to help so many people enjoy it. You get to do this. You don't have to do it. You get to do it, it's kind of like cleaning the house.
Tammy Hershberger:So instead of me saying I have to clean the house, I get to do it. It's kind of like cleaning the house. So instead of me saying I have to clean the house, I get to and I'm thankful for that because I have a nice home to clean, or god provided a home, or whatever you have a roof over your head.
Albert Bramante:You have a roof over your head to clean, so you get to clean it. That should be great I love that.
Tammy Hershberger:Um. Can you tell my listeners one for your book? Um, rise above the script and then all your other businesses. How do we get a hold of you? How do we find you? Where do we get your book?
Albert Bramante:Well, you can find my book on Amazon. It's called Rise Above the Script Confirming Self-Doubt and Mastering Self-Sabotage for Performing Artists. It's available. I have it available as a textbook, paperback, ebook and audiobook, so I would definitely look for that. You can also go to my website, albertpermonticom. I'm also on LinkedIn, so you can find me under Albert Permonti and I'd love to connect.
Tammy Hershberger:Yeah, I thank you so much, Albert, for coming on here and talking to us.
Albert Bramante:Thank you again, Tammy.
Tammy Hershberger:It was a blessing. I wish you tons of blessings and I know there's going to be great things for you. Thank you all for listening. I hope you go out and get his book, get his website and see what he's doing, because Albert's got some good stuff here. We thank you all for listening. I ask you to like, share, subscribe and we will see you on the next one. And remember in the world of business, every success story begins with a passionate dream and ends with a strategic billion-dollar handshake. Stay ambitious, stay innovative and keep making those deals that reshape tomorrow. Thank you all for tuning in and until next time, remember. Proverbs 3.3 says Let love and faithfulness never leave you. Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. That way, you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. And remember if you like what you heard today, click the follow button so you never miss an episode.
